Honesty. Integrity or Destruction?
As you get older, you tend to lean towards the belief system that "just being honest" is always the right way when dealing with a certain situation. But have you ever wondered if honesty is really the best policy? Does your honesty shows integrity? Or does it cause harm to others that it can turn into something destructive?
Whether you are venting, expressing yourself, or airing your feelings out, you really need to start thinking about how you use and define honesty. You have to be cautious about how this may put a permanent damage in your relationships. The truth is, you don't need to get physical just to inflict pain onto someone to make them suffer. Words can be as hurtful and painful like a sharp knife cutting right through your skin, and sometimes, worst.
The Negative Side Of Honesty
Honesty is often used as a form of self-gratification. How?
When you let your problems and frustration sit, you will eventually release all the pressure that you have been carrying for a very long time. That feeling of sensation is an example of self-gratification. But what you don't realize is that, when you dump all these heavy emotions on others, there is a huge possibility that you will be putting a big dent into your relationships especially to those you are most intimate with. We end up mistreating people mostly by lashing out and hurting the soul of those we supposedly love and care about.
No one really taught us how to manage anger. The way we express our anger is based on what we see, what we feel, and what we know. In short, if speaking your mind and saying "I'm just being honest" is your way of protecting your integrity, I'm sorry to say, but you are hurting it more than you know. It's the sad truth that managing our anger is truly something people might need to take time and effort to learn.
While you may feel temporary relieved when you shoot rounds of honesty on someone, you will end up paying a dreadful price for this temporary satisfaction as we anguish our relationships and our self esteem. Ask yourself. Do you really feel good when you impose pain onto others? does it feel right to you?
When is the right time to be honest?
It's never too late to learn how to change and handle anger. Take into consideration of what to say before you speak and the actions you want to take. You can definitely be both honest and sincere if you are sensitive about the choices of words you pick. Ask yourself how the person will feel if you say this or that. Consider whether being honest will be helpful and constructive to the other person and in the relationship rather than thinking only about how it will make you feel.
The Difference Between Honesty and Hatred
When a person uses honesty in purpose to impose pain on others due to their own self insecurities and misery, that is the definition of hate. If you speak cruel things about other people especially the ones you supposedly love and care about, that is pure hatred. Never wonder why you never had that much genuine love around you if you never learned how to be kind and genuine yourself.
When your honesty speaks from the deepest part of your emotional core, you will stimulate a feeling of empathy rather than hostility or hatred. Following this step is a great way to turn conflicts into connections by promoting a real and genuine relationship that is based on the right kind of honesty. Open mindedness is the key to build relationships whether it is with your partner, your family, your friends, and even your colleagues.
All the love and honesty,